Dessert Hot Dogs

I tried to publish this on Another Social Media Platform, but it was so long that it just got throttled. Which is a bummer. I miss writing longform, I miss journaling. Anyway, here's what I posted. I'm just writing this for me, really, but if you enjoyed it, let me know. Maybe I'll try to keep this up.
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Hi Facebook, I know you just banhammered me, but I'm gonna write in you like you're a LiveJournal post anyway. Today Kit and Avi came over to visit! This is a Big Deal, because not only does no one EVER come to my house, but people also NEVER come all the way from the CITY to the SUBURBS just to HANG OUT. It simply ISN'T DONE. But they did, and it made me feel really special!

We spent the afternoon goofing around and talking about nonsense, like how "good" Snowpiercer is (it isn't), and how terrible Mortal Engines will be (it will be) and how difficult it is to watch horror movies here in 2018 (and also Poultrygeist was not very good.) Then I drew some pictures of french fries. Can you name all the french fries? Would you like to rate them? The french fries, not the pictures of french fries. We did. Everyone agrees that curly fries are the best.

Then we got hungry, and after introducing them to the idea of a "s'mores cone" that I remembered from someone's feed, Avi decided he was interested in Dessert Hotdogs. Then we spent a very long time googling dessert hotdogs and Avi spent some time spiral cutting hotdogs and putting them in s'mores cones. We judged him, very hard. (But we also supported his decision, as friends do.) It was almost like the old days, before Google had an answer to everything! We enjoyed a version of the internet that google often fails to let exist anymore - the weird internet. We learned how to puff rice (with a small cannon!) and that desk potatoes have websites. We also learned that we missed the death of StumbleUpon by a mere four days, and we were very said about that.

Friends! Real live human FRIENDS! In my HOUSE! Eating dessert hotdogs and reading #mattfraction comics and yelling about shitty movies with me!

A post shared by M'ris (@stiricide) on Jul 4, 2018 at 8:25pm PDT

At some point, Kit mentioned that she wished she had brought a comic book. Then she asked if I might maybe have a comic book for her to read. Readers, can you even believe what sort of monsters I had invited in to MY home? To think that they thought that I had a home! WITHOUT COMIC BOOKS! Luckily, Kit and I are still friends. She read Sex Criminals and The Beauty and enjoyed one more than the other, but you should guess which one.

Eventually we decided not to go to Narberth for fireworks, because being on a field in Narberth to find out whether or not it was going to thunderstorm on us seemed like a bad time. So we didn't watch anything blow up, except for those rice cannons, but that's ok. We also watched the fireworks on TV, and lip synched along with some Cher songs behind Avi's back (literally) and watched the fireflies in my yard. The fireflies always put on a very good show. We could also hear ALL the fireworks around my house, and it sounded like a goddamn war zone.

Which reminds me: I hope all your doggos are ok, dissent is patriotic and Black Lives Matter. Happy 4th